My bittersweet vacation

     Preparation.

My cousin and her family will be having at least 4 months of vacation in South Korea to experience a country who bears snow, I think. Since I used to lived here when there were classes and i don’t have summer classes now nor places to go this summer, my family and I agreed to be their housekeeper not knowing what would happen if I live there ALONE. Well, honestly, I really like there because of some reasons I just can’t discuss and now.  living alone there gives me a feeling I just can’t explain.

I’m quite eager for them to leave , I’m not a really bad person, because I’ll be soloing the things that we usually don’t have at home: a cabled television and an unlimited land line telephone, that I don’t want to abuse, I swear. Yes, you can call me ambitious, et cetera et cetera but never opportunistic. I’m just used in living here because of it’s simple luxury that made me comfortable as well as everybody else. Going back, living alone thrills me. It only means that there’s no one to instruct, command nor dictate me of what to do or what to clean next. What I’m trying to say is freedom, temporary or false freedom I must say, is at stake and I want to gamble.

Before they leave, I spent a week, almost at our own home to cherish the moments and things I might miss and vow our farewells to each other (very dramatic, what am I? an emo?), seriously, I went there to pack my things up and inform my other relatives where I”ll be spending my summer. Then 3 days before they leave, I was summoned there to  to discuss some errands and things I should do to maintain the cleanliness of the house. Luckily, they didn’t gave any limitations on what I should and shouldn’t do at this house like television curfew, but that would be useless if they attempt to discuss it to me.

 

     Departure.

The I’m-leaving-on-a-jet-plane part has arrived. Everything is in order and on their proper places. Cheerful goodbyes and final requests were exchanges and they left.

They left. Very simple. They just left me alone in this house with God-knows-what-other-creature-lies-within without knowing how and where to to start. I should be celebrating now that my false freedom has reach it’s time to bloom but I can’t. I’m dumb struck by the sudden silence that enveloped the whole house as they leave while I stay, alone. Guess I haven’t prepared for this moment after all. Loneliness and disappointment strike me at once giving me a homesick feeling immediately. I never knew that silence can be as frustrating as this, it caught me completely off guard when I least expected it. I think I overlooked that situation and focused on the good things I want to enjoy.

 

     Summer starts.

The first few weeks of being alone, well, uhm, I really feel bad. But luckily I figured out what will lessen the bitterness I feel, television.

Well, there are some things that I overlooked or miscalculated before staying here. First, hell, I can’t watch television 24/7 or else, my own eyes would suffer. What I’m trying to say is, family and a friend is 100% better than any television show on Earth, or any planetary rock roaming around the Milky Way . Going back, there’s a bunch of DVD movies here which I rated a good one either because I liked  their trailer or it caught my attention thru the sense of its story. I really want to watch them, but I can’t. They removed and hid the players adapters. My conclusion: they don’t want me to use that freaking DVD player.  Nevermind that, HBO saves the day. Second, they’re the one who’ll gonna the bill here, of course. That includes electricity, water, cable, land line and the DSL or the internet. But here’s a fact, the bill for the internet cost less than Php 1, 600. They’re paying for a service they don’t even use. I can’t use it neither because they lock two rooms including the their room where the computer is located. Waste of money isn’t it? Well, tell that to them.

 

     Lesson.

Enough for that silly ode of mine. I’m not really upset or anything. The computer thing, just came to my mind a week after they left. I was bored to death here that I mentioned things that weren’t worth trying for. I just focused on the bad images around me because I predict it wrong. But anyway, I’m still happy today. I have a bestfriend here that won’t leave me no matter what, the television.

my first time. really

I was sending my gm (group message) last night when my one of my classmate texted me if I’m making a blog. I wanted to say a plain “no” but i  reconsidered the question. So, i replied to her, “no. but I’m interested.”  She then gave me this website ,wordpress.com if ever you are lost, and  orient me with some interesting and really exciting idea about the world of blogging. Later, i texted here thanks and went to bed.

when i woke up early in the morning, about 9:07 am, I did my breakfast quite fast and rushed to open the computer. I open first my yahoo messenger and went to wordpress.com. Jumpy and eager, I signed up immediately and gave one of my email addresses, since I had six and only four of them were working either because I forgot the the username or the password. I am nervous because I don’t know what to put it in their since I’m not pretty good at English. Nevertheless, it’s experience I’m truly seeking here. I wonder what language am I to use here, so I pick up Tagalog instead. I finished the process at about 10:12 am and activated my account and there, I had my own account. But wait, there’s two problem: first, I won’t tell it because you may just laugh at me, second, my blogsite is purely Tagalog and I don’t understand a thing! Whoa! I can’t understand my native tongue neither the foreign language which is English. What have I learned by the way on my secondary education? Naah! I don’t know where they went. LOL. So, I did what’s on my mind, create another account.

That’s two username down and one to go. This time, I pick up English as the primary language. When I finished and prepared to create my own blog, something went wrong. I don’t know where but I do hope it’s not inside my skull. I really got confused in the homepage, the blog, featured, my username, my blogspot everything. So again, I let my mind do the action: i created another username.

Silly it may sound, but I panic easily when I’m alone and there’s no one to share the troubles to.

Since this morning, I only created one blog without knowing if I’m clicking the right button or typing in the appropriate words to fill in the space of my own blogspot.

And by the way, I ended up eventually using Tagalog as the primary language.

And if my English is terrible, I’m asking for you to give me an exemption because not everybody can write, type, speak or understand perfectly, including me.